The Motivation Behind my Madness

A few people have asked why I have named my memoir “Farting Rainbows” or why I purchased the domain: Most times this question is asked with great distaste, and that is exactly what I was going for; here’s why:

When I was in a violent relationship I spent a lot of time painting a perfect picture, I was actually hiding behind a big, stinky pile of crap … if anyone looked, and I mean really looked they would see that things weren’t what they seemed. Like, when his daughter came to visit and watched him try to smother me with a pillow. She knew, she could see that he and I were merely “Farting Rainbows.”

The signs were there, but the symptoms were vague. A few people saw it though, and they knew … they helped me out of the situation and for a short period I felt amazing joy in my life … maybe even a little bit of love in reciprocation, but who knows? Then, all hell broke loose and I went back to save lives, because the known evil is far better than unknown dreams.

When I left him for good, I had very little emotional support, I had burned those bridges the first time I had left him and then gone back. Everyone had lost faith in my word, my intentions, and my ability to survive. Maybe I had even lost faith in myself. Yet, I had four little faces looking to me, they too had survived, and I couldn’t let them down … again.

So, the fact that my choice of titles is distasteful to some, that’s fine, because the subject matter should be distasteful to everyone.


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